April 19, 2020
Dear Members and Friends:
Although a pandemic may separate us physically, it need not sever us from community. While we cannot be together in body at this time, we can be together in spirit. Let us then, set aside some time today to gather in spirit with one another and, through ritual and reflection, support one another by strengthening our resolve to remain faithful to our principles and maintain the bonds of community, friendship and love.
Below is an abbreviated worship service for use at home while limits on public gatherings are in place due to Covid-19. A new service will be posted and emailed each week until we can resume worship in the sanctuary at BUUC.
Chalice Lighting
Light a candle at home or in your mind’s eye mindful of people from our church community and around the world who, though physically separated, are gathered in spirit.
Connection and Commitment
By Cynthia Landrum
As we kindle this flame,
May it spark in each of us
Connection and commitment
To this living tradition
And to each other.
AFFIRMATION:
● Together: We unite in an atmosphere of care and support to foster spiritual health and growth.
● Together: We focus on sharing our ideas and histories, with warmth, hope, loving friendship and an open mind.
● Together: We nurture stability for our daily lives and seek motivation to reach out to the larger community.
Reading/Poem for Reflection
Managing Stress During the COVID-19 Crisis
by Rita Schiano(*more info about Rita is at the end of this document)
Stress is the body’s reactions to a mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition caused by adverse external influences. The operative phrase is adverse external influences. Stress responds to external stimuli and differs from anxiety, which is an internal reaction to stress. While stress and anxiety share some emotional and physical symptoms, they have different origins. Today we’ll focus on stress. For when we are in turmoil our health is compromised.
We are hard-wired for stress. When the brain senses a threat to our survival it triggers the fight-or-flight response, a physiological reaction in the body's autonomic nervous system. This response mechanism releases adrenaline, resulting in an increase in heart rate, blood pressure, causes muscles to tense up, digestion and saliva production to cease. These actions allow for adrenaline to flow through our blood stream unimpeded. When the threat is gone, the adrenaline metabolizes as the body returns to balance or homeostasis.
This automatic response happens whether the threat is real or perceived. But a long-term threat like this pandemic and its perceived consequences causes the body to continuously release the stress hormone cortisol. Too much cortisol can suppress the immune system which can lead to serious health concerns.
Your first line of defense in dealing with stress is knowing your physical response. What is your body telling you? Is your heart racing? Your blood pressure rising? Do you feel tension in your neck or back? Is your eating off? Are you having more indigestion after you eat, or are you finding you can’t eat because of the stress you are feeling? Pay attention. Raise your level of awareness to what your body is telling you so you can take action to help the body regain balance.
One easy action is mindful breathing. The act of taking 10-25 mindful breaths can help lower your heart rate and bring blood pressure down. A mindful breath is simply this: inhaling, holding for a count of four, then exhaling. The reason to mentally count to 4 is so that your mind focuses on breathing, and not on thoughts that are causing you to stress. Start with 10 breaths, slowly increasing to 25. Do this several times a day, especially before going to bed. It will help you sleep better.
I find it somewhat ironic this pandemic is happening in the year 2020. Think about this: 2020 is associated with vision. Latin verb specere, which means to see, to look at, to observe is the root of many words, such as spectacles. I wear eyeglasses to correct my myopia, my nearsightedness. Without glasses I cannot clearly see things that are distant. Spectacles give me 2020 vision.
If you wear glasses only when reading, then you have hyperopia, farsightedness, which causes things near to you to be out of focus. Spectacles give farsighted people 2020 vision.
This COVID-19 crisis has made us feel emotionally farsighted: things that are near to us, life as we know it, is now out of focus; and emotionally myopia: we cannot clearly see what our lives down the road will look like. We are living in the uncharted territory of unabated uncertainty.
The word speculate derives from that Latin verb. There is a lot of speculation going on right row.
While the uncertainty we are living with can be overwhelming, we do have a set of tools at our disposal: the skills and attitudes of resilience, which help us get through the difficult times in our lives. Our capacity for resilience is hard-wired in our brain, like the fight or flight response. But unlike the fight or flight response, it is not automatic. Our resilience is influenced by our life experiences, what I call our Habitudes, those patterns of thought and behavior affecting your attitudes towards life, and which may or may not serve you.
Our thoughts influence our bodies directly. COVID-19 is forcing us to change our perspective. Life will not return to normal. Our lives will have a new normal and what that new normal will look like is uncertain. However, we can prepare for this by strengthening our resiliency.
The Holy Grail of resilience is resilient optimism. We say optimists see the water glass as half full and pessimists see it as half empty. Resilient optimists, however, see it as both, because that’s how life’s events are. Resilient optimists take those half empty moments and bring other factors of resilience to them to ‘raise the water level’ so to speak.
One way is through the resilience skill of flexibility. Being flexible means embracing a willingness to learn and to grow. Being willing to face your fears; to control your attitude, no matter what is going on around you. For our lives are not determined by what happens to us, but by how we react to what happens; not by what life brings to us, but by the attitude we bring to life.
Another factor is our connectedness to others. This is so critical at this time when we are asked to be physically distant from one another. We need connection. We need to be communicating with one another, which is another aspect of resiliency, whether through social media, FaceTime, Skype, or like we are doing now via Zoom. Or how about that old method of communicating: the telephone. True connection is physical. Texting and typing are not enough.
Our capacity to manage strong emotions and impulses is another factor. Situations happen that are out of our control, like this pandemic. Emotions are a reaction to how we're perceiving our experience. Learning to respond to them, rather than to react, is key.
While it’s important to stay informed about this crisis, it is also crucially important to do so wisely. Avail yourself to those who are presenting the facts without agenda, people such as Dr. Anthony Fauci and Robert Redfield, Director of CDC. These are the people who are telling us the truth of the matter, who are giving us the facts, who are trying to keep everything as stable as possible by explaining why we must take specific actions in order to flatten that curve and keep the number of cases from spiking up.
Another factor of resilience is being able to make realistic plans and take action to carry them out. Tackle what I call the “Iwishihads.” You know, “I wish I had the time to _______).” Well, folks, now you have the time. Don’t try to rush through the list or you won’t get things done. We all are going to have a lot of time on our hands the next few weeks, and let’s be realistic, maybe even longer.
I want to mention one more factor: Being able to find purpose and meaning in one’s life, which leads me to another derivative of that Latin verb: introspection. This is actually a wonderful time for self-discovery. What are you learning about yourself and your purpose in life? How has this moment in time changed you? Changed your outlook? Hindsight is 2020.
Lastly, there is one more word derived from specere. Respect. COVID-19 has raised our level of respect for doctors, nurses, first responders, and all the unsung heroes who make a hospital function – including custodians, food preparers, laundry services.
We have gained respect and gratitude for all people who leave their homes each and every day to provide essential services ---from assembly line workers to grocery store clerks to zookeepers.
Strategies for managing stress:
Strategies for building resilience:
Questions for reflection:
Joys and Concerns
If participating on Facebook: As you feel so moved, post a joy or concern you are holding this week. Remember this is a public forum so please exercise discretion, respect confidentially and refrain from moralizing.
If participating as on ZOOM recipient: You may raise your hand and wait to be called on or post your joy and concern in the chat box
If participating as an email recipient: As you feel so moved, speak aloud a joy or concern you are holding, mindful you are not alone, but one among many with joys and concerns seeking expression.
Moment of Silent Meditation/Prayer
Take a moment to be still and listen to the wisdom of your heart and /or pray or chant words meaningful to you or in your own words.
Music
If you are able to join us via Zoom on Sunday, Dave Yutzler will sing the following song.
"Kindred We Now Meet to Worship" by Thommy Snell
adapted for BUUC by Lila M Farrar
Kindred, we now meet together,
Reaching out through screen and phone.
Though we dwell in isolation,
We don’t have to be alone.
Worshiping beyond our building,
Our connection’s no less real.
Though we cannot meet in person,
Covenant unites us still.
Siblings, share a song of gladness
Lifting spirits, spreading cheer,
So that in these days of sadness
We won’t be consumed by fear.
In this time of mass confusion,
Sickness, loss, can overwhelm,
Let’s encourage one another
Hands not joined, but hearts are held.
Friends, be gentle with each other,
There’s so much we’re going through.
May this be a time for healing,
Holding space for grieving too.
Bodies, minds, and hearts are weary,
Anguish fills the aching soul,
But we know with perseverance
Broken hearts can be made whole.
If you are unable to join us, please enjoy this piece, “For the Earth Forever Turning”
by Kim Oler and presented East Shore Unitarian Church Director of Music Eric Lane Barnes https://vimeo.com/403524808
Extinguishing the chalice
Blow out the candle you lit physically or in your mind’s eye.
Benediction
Recite aloud or in silence
Peace be my companion
Have courage
Hold onto what is good
Return to no person evil for evil
Strengthen the fainthearted
Support the weak
Help the suffering
Honor all beings
Amen and Blessed Be
*Thank you to Rita Schiano for her presentation today. Rita has been attending the BUUC for 20 years. She is a resilience strategist and coach, speaker, and founder of Rita Schiano ~ Live A Flourishing Life.
Rita is offering online sessions on managing stress through resilience via the Zoom platform. There is NO CHARGE to participate. To register, please send her an e-mail at rita@ritaschiano.com and she will send you the sign-in information and confirmation.Sessions will run between 30-40 minutes on Tuesday, April 21: 1:00 p.m. EST and Thursday, April 23: 10:00 a.m. EST
Here is a link to a presentation Rita gave earlier this month about Managing Stress During the Covid-19 Crisis: https://youtu.be/Hw_NyhvzkE0
Dear Members and Friends:
Although a pandemic may separate us physically, it need not sever us from community. While we cannot be together in body at this time, we can be together in spirit. Let us then, set aside some time today to gather in spirit with one another and, through ritual and reflection, support one another by strengthening our resolve to remain faithful to our principles and maintain the bonds of community, friendship and love.
Below is an abbreviated worship service for use at home while limits on public gatherings are in place due to Covid-19. A new service will be posted and emailed each week until we can resume worship in the sanctuary at BUUC.
Chalice Lighting
Light a candle at home or in your mind’s eye mindful of people from our church community and around the world who, though physically separated, are gathered in spirit.
Connection and Commitment
By Cynthia Landrum
As we kindle this flame,
May it spark in each of us
Connection and commitment
To this living tradition
And to each other.
AFFIRMATION:
● Together: We unite in an atmosphere of care and support to foster spiritual health and growth.
● Together: We focus on sharing our ideas and histories, with warmth, hope, loving friendship and an open mind.
● Together: We nurture stability for our daily lives and seek motivation to reach out to the larger community.
Reading/Poem for Reflection
Managing Stress During the COVID-19 Crisis
by Rita Schiano(*more info about Rita is at the end of this document)
Stress is the body’s reactions to a mentally or emotionally disruptive or upsetting condition caused by adverse external influences. The operative phrase is adverse external influences. Stress responds to external stimuli and differs from anxiety, which is an internal reaction to stress. While stress and anxiety share some emotional and physical symptoms, they have different origins. Today we’ll focus on stress. For when we are in turmoil our health is compromised.
We are hard-wired for stress. When the brain senses a threat to our survival it triggers the fight-or-flight response, a physiological reaction in the body's autonomic nervous system. This response mechanism releases adrenaline, resulting in an increase in heart rate, blood pressure, causes muscles to tense up, digestion and saliva production to cease. These actions allow for adrenaline to flow through our blood stream unimpeded. When the threat is gone, the adrenaline metabolizes as the body returns to balance or homeostasis.
This automatic response happens whether the threat is real or perceived. But a long-term threat like this pandemic and its perceived consequences causes the body to continuously release the stress hormone cortisol. Too much cortisol can suppress the immune system which can lead to serious health concerns.
Your first line of defense in dealing with stress is knowing your physical response. What is your body telling you? Is your heart racing? Your blood pressure rising? Do you feel tension in your neck or back? Is your eating off? Are you having more indigestion after you eat, or are you finding you can’t eat because of the stress you are feeling? Pay attention. Raise your level of awareness to what your body is telling you so you can take action to help the body regain balance.
One easy action is mindful breathing. The act of taking 10-25 mindful breaths can help lower your heart rate and bring blood pressure down. A mindful breath is simply this: inhaling, holding for a count of four, then exhaling. The reason to mentally count to 4 is so that your mind focuses on breathing, and not on thoughts that are causing you to stress. Start with 10 breaths, slowly increasing to 25. Do this several times a day, especially before going to bed. It will help you sleep better.
I find it somewhat ironic this pandemic is happening in the year 2020. Think about this: 2020 is associated with vision. Latin verb specere, which means to see, to look at, to observe is the root of many words, such as spectacles. I wear eyeglasses to correct my myopia, my nearsightedness. Without glasses I cannot clearly see things that are distant. Spectacles give me 2020 vision.
If you wear glasses only when reading, then you have hyperopia, farsightedness, which causes things near to you to be out of focus. Spectacles give farsighted people 2020 vision.
This COVID-19 crisis has made us feel emotionally farsighted: things that are near to us, life as we know it, is now out of focus; and emotionally myopia: we cannot clearly see what our lives down the road will look like. We are living in the uncharted territory of unabated uncertainty.
The word speculate derives from that Latin verb. There is a lot of speculation going on right row.
- How long with our need to be physically distant from one another last?
- When will the curve flatten?
- When will we get back to work?
- Could there be a second coronavirus outbreak if we move too soon?
While the uncertainty we are living with can be overwhelming, we do have a set of tools at our disposal: the skills and attitudes of resilience, which help us get through the difficult times in our lives. Our capacity for resilience is hard-wired in our brain, like the fight or flight response. But unlike the fight or flight response, it is not automatic. Our resilience is influenced by our life experiences, what I call our Habitudes, those patterns of thought and behavior affecting your attitudes towards life, and which may or may not serve you.
Our thoughts influence our bodies directly. COVID-19 is forcing us to change our perspective. Life will not return to normal. Our lives will have a new normal and what that new normal will look like is uncertain. However, we can prepare for this by strengthening our resiliency.
The Holy Grail of resilience is resilient optimism. We say optimists see the water glass as half full and pessimists see it as half empty. Resilient optimists, however, see it as both, because that’s how life’s events are. Resilient optimists take those half empty moments and bring other factors of resilience to them to ‘raise the water level’ so to speak.
One way is through the resilience skill of flexibility. Being flexible means embracing a willingness to learn and to grow. Being willing to face your fears; to control your attitude, no matter what is going on around you. For our lives are not determined by what happens to us, but by how we react to what happens; not by what life brings to us, but by the attitude we bring to life.
Another factor is our connectedness to others. This is so critical at this time when we are asked to be physically distant from one another. We need connection. We need to be communicating with one another, which is another aspect of resiliency, whether through social media, FaceTime, Skype, or like we are doing now via Zoom. Or how about that old method of communicating: the telephone. True connection is physical. Texting and typing are not enough.
Our capacity to manage strong emotions and impulses is another factor. Situations happen that are out of our control, like this pandemic. Emotions are a reaction to how we're perceiving our experience. Learning to respond to them, rather than to react, is key.
While it’s important to stay informed about this crisis, it is also crucially important to do so wisely. Avail yourself to those who are presenting the facts without agenda, people such as Dr. Anthony Fauci and Robert Redfield, Director of CDC. These are the people who are telling us the truth of the matter, who are giving us the facts, who are trying to keep everything as stable as possible by explaining why we must take specific actions in order to flatten that curve and keep the number of cases from spiking up.
Another factor of resilience is being able to make realistic plans and take action to carry them out. Tackle what I call the “Iwishihads.” You know, “I wish I had the time to _______).” Well, folks, now you have the time. Don’t try to rush through the list or you won’t get things done. We all are going to have a lot of time on our hands the next few weeks, and let’s be realistic, maybe even longer.
I want to mention one more factor: Being able to find purpose and meaning in one’s life, which leads me to another derivative of that Latin verb: introspection. This is actually a wonderful time for self-discovery. What are you learning about yourself and your purpose in life? How has this moment in time changed you? Changed your outlook? Hindsight is 2020.
Lastly, there is one more word derived from specere. Respect. COVID-19 has raised our level of respect for doctors, nurses, first responders, and all the unsung heroes who make a hospital function – including custodians, food preparers, laundry services.
We have gained respect and gratitude for all people who leave their homes each and every day to provide essential services ---from assembly line workers to grocery store clerks to zookeepers.
Strategies for managing stress:
- listen to your body
- remember that your greatest weapon against stress is your ability to choose one thought over another.
- acknowledge what you feel and don't deny your feelings
- accept what you feel and don't judge
- remember to take a mindful breath several times a day
Strategies for building resilience:
- develop an attitude of optimism
- establish and maintain connections
- limit media coverage
- accept change as part of life
- engage in opportunities of self-discovery
Questions for reflection:
- What steps will you take to manage your stress?
- What items from your “Iwishihad” list will you do now?
- How can you engage in opportunities of self-discovery?
Joys and Concerns
If participating on Facebook: As you feel so moved, post a joy or concern you are holding this week. Remember this is a public forum so please exercise discretion, respect confidentially and refrain from moralizing.
If participating as on ZOOM recipient: You may raise your hand and wait to be called on or post your joy and concern in the chat box
If participating as an email recipient: As you feel so moved, speak aloud a joy or concern you are holding, mindful you are not alone, but one among many with joys and concerns seeking expression.
Moment of Silent Meditation/Prayer
Take a moment to be still and listen to the wisdom of your heart and /or pray or chant words meaningful to you or in your own words.
Music
If you are able to join us via Zoom on Sunday, Dave Yutzler will sing the following song.
"Kindred We Now Meet to Worship" by Thommy Snell
adapted for BUUC by Lila M Farrar
Kindred, we now meet together,
Reaching out through screen and phone.
Though we dwell in isolation,
We don’t have to be alone.
Worshiping beyond our building,
Our connection’s no less real.
Though we cannot meet in person,
Covenant unites us still.
Siblings, share a song of gladness
Lifting spirits, spreading cheer,
So that in these days of sadness
We won’t be consumed by fear.
In this time of mass confusion,
Sickness, loss, can overwhelm,
Let’s encourage one another
Hands not joined, but hearts are held.
Friends, be gentle with each other,
There’s so much we’re going through.
May this be a time for healing,
Holding space for grieving too.
Bodies, minds, and hearts are weary,
Anguish fills the aching soul,
But we know with perseverance
Broken hearts can be made whole.
If you are unable to join us, please enjoy this piece, “For the Earth Forever Turning”
by Kim Oler and presented East Shore Unitarian Church Director of Music Eric Lane Barnes https://vimeo.com/403524808
Extinguishing the chalice
Blow out the candle you lit physically or in your mind’s eye.
Benediction
Recite aloud or in silence
Peace be my companion
Have courage
Hold onto what is good
Return to no person evil for evil
Strengthen the fainthearted
Support the weak
Help the suffering
Honor all beings
Amen and Blessed Be
*Thank you to Rita Schiano for her presentation today. Rita has been attending the BUUC for 20 years. She is a resilience strategist and coach, speaker, and founder of Rita Schiano ~ Live A Flourishing Life.
Rita is offering online sessions on managing stress through resilience via the Zoom platform. There is NO CHARGE to participate. To register, please send her an e-mail at rita@ritaschiano.com and she will send you the sign-in information and confirmation.Sessions will run between 30-40 minutes on Tuesday, April 21: 1:00 p.m. EST and Thursday, April 23: 10:00 a.m. EST
Here is a link to a presentation Rita gave earlier this month about Managing Stress During the Covid-19 Crisis: https://youtu.be/Hw_NyhvzkE0
