BUUC Summer Alternative Worship: August 2, 2020
Dear Members and Friends:
Although a pandemic may separate us physically, it need not sever us from community. While we cannot be together in body at this time, we can be together in spirit. Let us then, set aside some time today to gather in spirit with one another and, through ritual and reflection, support one another by strengthening our resolve to remain faithful to our principles and maintain the bonds of community, friendship and love.
Below is an abbreviated worship service for use at home while limits on public gatherings are in place due to Covid-19. A new service will be posted and emailed each week until we can resume worship in the sanctuary at BUUC.
Today’s service was prepared by Roxann Smith.
If you can, please join us on-line or telephone via Zoom, at 9:30 AM on Sunday. A separate email will have the details.
Announcements
Announcements are listed at the end of this document. If you have any announcements for the Zoom service, please type them into the Chat box or let the leader know you have an announcement.
Singing Bowl
Chalice Lighting
Light a candle at home or in your mind’s eye mindful of people from our church community and around the world who, though physically separated, are gathered in spirit.
Our chalice lighting today ”A Communion Of Heart And Soul” is by Bruce Southworth
Recite aloud or in silence:
For the gift of this day and for our community of spiritual nurture and compassion, we give thanks.
We light this chalice as a symbol of our faith.
May our many sparks meet and merge in communion of heart and soul.
Affirmation:
“One of the most beautiful gifts in the world is the gift of encouragement. When someone encourages you, that person helps you over a threshold you might otherwise never have crossed on your own. There are times of great uncertainty in every life. Left alone at such a time, you feel dishevelment and confusion like gravity. When a friend comes with words of encouragement, a light and lightness visit you and you begin to find the stairs and the door out of the dark. The sense of encouragement you feel from the friend is not simply her words or gestures; it is rather her whole presence enfolding you and helping you find the concealed door. The encouraging presence manages to understand you and put herself in your shoes. There is no judgment but words of relief and release.”
An Excerpt from the book, Eternal Echoes by John O’Donohue www.johnodonohue.com
Joys and Concerns
If participating on Facebook: As you feel so moved, post a joy or concern you are holding this week. Remember this is a public forum so please exercise discretion, respect confidentially and refrain from moralizing.
If participating as on ZOOM recipient: You may raise your hand and wait to be called on or post your joy and concern in the chat box
If participating as an email recipient: As you feel so moved, speak aloud a joy or concern you are holding, mindful you are not alone, but one among many with joys and concerns seeking expression.
Reflection
John O’Donahue was an Irish poet, philosopher, author and priest. He was born in Ireland in 1955 and grew up on a working farm speaking gaelic as his first language. He died in his sleep in 2008 at the age of 52. The cause of his death was never publicly revealed.
I was first introduced to John O’Donahue by Pete Sutherland, a musician who I hope will be playing at the BUUC with his band Pete’s Posse next year.
The words of John O’Donahue gave me a warm feeling while I thought of times people encouraged me and I wanted to share those feelings. But as I was writing this, I thought which do you want first, good news or bad news? Should I write about good encouragement first or bad encouragement?'' I want to end on a good note, so I’ll start with the bad news first.
When someone is faltering, most of us want to find some way to help that person. We want to give the courage to succeed in their life or particular endeavor. But sometimes what we say really isn’t really that encouraging. I read an Inc Magazine article by Bill Murphy Jr. about three toxic phrases and they are phrases you might use when you are trying to encourage someone.
One of the phrases he mentions is, “how are you doing, good?” Let’s just nip any issues right off because obviously you don’t want to hear them. You may think you are reinforcing that you think they are doing well. But really you are saying, I don’t want to hear your problems. You can just ask a person how they are doing, you don’t need to answer the question for them
Another phrase is “I know how you feel”. When someone says that to me, my initial internal response is not very nice. The nice version is “how can they presume to know how I feel?” The person may be trying to be sympathetic but we can’t truly know how a person feels unless we give them the opportunity to tell us. More often than not, the phrase is followed by “when this happened to me, I felt…” You’ve now just turned the attention away from the person and onto yourself.
The author of the article has a personal favorite and it is mine too, “why don’t you just do this” or “you should try this.” Like a lot of people, I want to solve problems. It’s what I did for a living. Programming is just taking a problem and figuring out what works to solve it. When someone tells you they have a problem, you want to fix it. But when you tell people what they should do, you are implying that they are broken. Then again, it’s not about them any more but about how you can solve their problems.
What’s the best way to encourage someone? This is my own opinion and I am the first person to admit I need to do a better job. Number one is to listen to them. Really listen to them. Don’t start thinking about how what they are saying relates to you and what you want to tell them. Stop and really hear what the person is saying. When you ask how they are doing and they answer, don’t give a quick acknowledgement and then run on into your own life.
Ask questions and listen to the answers. You can offer help but your help is to help that person come up with their own answers. In the corporate world we always said that the clients had to buy into the solution. So in coming up with solutions, we asked the clients a lot of questions. How would you solve the problem? Why would that work? Are there any problems with that solution? Are there other ways around the problem? It’s an easy trap to zoom in to solve the problem. It is much harder to try and get more and more information to really understand the issue and help your friend understand the issue. But be careful, you don’t want to sound like a two-year old constantly asking “why?”
Acknowledge their strengths. Let the person know that they have the skills to succeed by pointing out their past success. Truly complement them and let them know you see them and value them.
And finally, just be there. When my friend’s husband died suddenly, she told me about Ruth King just coming and sitting with her and letting her know she was not alone. Your presence can be a powerful gift.
Meditation
Please listen to John O”Donohue read Beannacht, A Blessing
https://youtu.be/0rYnWCophIM
Now take a moment to be still and listen to the wisdom of your heart and /or pray or chant words meaningful to you or in your own words. Or maybe take this moment to think about the people who have encouraged you.
Question(s) for reflection:
After the service today, if you would like to stay connected a little longer we can discuss the readings/reflections
Who has encouraged you? How did that encouragement make you feel?
What do you think is the best way to encourage someone?
What is your response to the reading? Did it touch/move or disturb you?
In what way is the reading relevant to your life experience past or present?
What might you take from this reading into the week ahead?
Extinguishing the chalice
Recite aloud or in silence:
We Are One by Amy Zucker Morgenstern
Never has it been more true than now:
We extinguish this flame,
But the sparks within us remain alight.
From each of us, in our supposed solitude,
The signals buzz and hum, sparkling through space one to another,
Connecting us invisibly
But palpably.
We are one.
And from every window,
Our light shines.
Blow out the candle you lit physically or in your mind’s eye.
Benediction
Recite aloud or in silence
Peace be my companion
Have courage
Hold onto what is good
Return to no person evil for evil
Strengthen the fainthearted
Support the weak
Help the suffering
Honor all beings
Amen and Blessed Be
Benediction Response: “Peace Be Unto This Congregation”
Announcements
There are no announcements this week :)
Dear Members and Friends:
Although a pandemic may separate us physically, it need not sever us from community. While we cannot be together in body at this time, we can be together in spirit. Let us then, set aside some time today to gather in spirit with one another and, through ritual and reflection, support one another by strengthening our resolve to remain faithful to our principles and maintain the bonds of community, friendship and love.
Below is an abbreviated worship service for use at home while limits on public gatherings are in place due to Covid-19. A new service will be posted and emailed each week until we can resume worship in the sanctuary at BUUC.
Today’s service was prepared by Roxann Smith.
If you can, please join us on-line or telephone via Zoom, at 9:30 AM on Sunday. A separate email will have the details.
Announcements
Announcements are listed at the end of this document. If you have any announcements for the Zoom service, please type them into the Chat box or let the leader know you have an announcement.
Singing Bowl
Chalice Lighting
Light a candle at home or in your mind’s eye mindful of people from our church community and around the world who, though physically separated, are gathered in spirit.
Our chalice lighting today ”A Communion Of Heart And Soul” is by Bruce Southworth
Recite aloud or in silence:
For the gift of this day and for our community of spiritual nurture and compassion, we give thanks.
We light this chalice as a symbol of our faith.
May our many sparks meet and merge in communion of heart and soul.
Affirmation:
- Together: We unite in an atmosphere of care and support to foster spiritual health and growth.
- Together: We focus on sharing our ideas and histories, with warmth, hope, loving friendship and an open mind.
- Together: We nurture stability for our daily lives and seek motivation to reach out to the larger community.
“One of the most beautiful gifts in the world is the gift of encouragement. When someone encourages you, that person helps you over a threshold you might otherwise never have crossed on your own. There are times of great uncertainty in every life. Left alone at such a time, you feel dishevelment and confusion like gravity. When a friend comes with words of encouragement, a light and lightness visit you and you begin to find the stairs and the door out of the dark. The sense of encouragement you feel from the friend is not simply her words or gestures; it is rather her whole presence enfolding you and helping you find the concealed door. The encouraging presence manages to understand you and put herself in your shoes. There is no judgment but words of relief and release.”
An Excerpt from the book, Eternal Echoes by John O’Donohue www.johnodonohue.com
Joys and Concerns
If participating on Facebook: As you feel so moved, post a joy or concern you are holding this week. Remember this is a public forum so please exercise discretion, respect confidentially and refrain from moralizing.
If participating as on ZOOM recipient: You may raise your hand and wait to be called on or post your joy and concern in the chat box
If participating as an email recipient: As you feel so moved, speak aloud a joy or concern you are holding, mindful you are not alone, but one among many with joys and concerns seeking expression.
Reflection
John O’Donahue was an Irish poet, philosopher, author and priest. He was born in Ireland in 1955 and grew up on a working farm speaking gaelic as his first language. He died in his sleep in 2008 at the age of 52. The cause of his death was never publicly revealed.
I was first introduced to John O’Donahue by Pete Sutherland, a musician who I hope will be playing at the BUUC with his band Pete’s Posse next year.
The words of John O’Donahue gave me a warm feeling while I thought of times people encouraged me and I wanted to share those feelings. But as I was writing this, I thought which do you want first, good news or bad news? Should I write about good encouragement first or bad encouragement?'' I want to end on a good note, so I’ll start with the bad news first.
When someone is faltering, most of us want to find some way to help that person. We want to give the courage to succeed in their life or particular endeavor. But sometimes what we say really isn’t really that encouraging. I read an Inc Magazine article by Bill Murphy Jr. about three toxic phrases and they are phrases you might use when you are trying to encourage someone.
One of the phrases he mentions is, “how are you doing, good?” Let’s just nip any issues right off because obviously you don’t want to hear them. You may think you are reinforcing that you think they are doing well. But really you are saying, I don’t want to hear your problems. You can just ask a person how they are doing, you don’t need to answer the question for them
Another phrase is “I know how you feel”. When someone says that to me, my initial internal response is not very nice. The nice version is “how can they presume to know how I feel?” The person may be trying to be sympathetic but we can’t truly know how a person feels unless we give them the opportunity to tell us. More often than not, the phrase is followed by “when this happened to me, I felt…” You’ve now just turned the attention away from the person and onto yourself.
The author of the article has a personal favorite and it is mine too, “why don’t you just do this” or “you should try this.” Like a lot of people, I want to solve problems. It’s what I did for a living. Programming is just taking a problem and figuring out what works to solve it. When someone tells you they have a problem, you want to fix it. But when you tell people what they should do, you are implying that they are broken. Then again, it’s not about them any more but about how you can solve their problems.
What’s the best way to encourage someone? This is my own opinion and I am the first person to admit I need to do a better job. Number one is to listen to them. Really listen to them. Don’t start thinking about how what they are saying relates to you and what you want to tell them. Stop and really hear what the person is saying. When you ask how they are doing and they answer, don’t give a quick acknowledgement and then run on into your own life.
Ask questions and listen to the answers. You can offer help but your help is to help that person come up with their own answers. In the corporate world we always said that the clients had to buy into the solution. So in coming up with solutions, we asked the clients a lot of questions. How would you solve the problem? Why would that work? Are there any problems with that solution? Are there other ways around the problem? It’s an easy trap to zoom in to solve the problem. It is much harder to try and get more and more information to really understand the issue and help your friend understand the issue. But be careful, you don’t want to sound like a two-year old constantly asking “why?”
Acknowledge their strengths. Let the person know that they have the skills to succeed by pointing out their past success. Truly complement them and let them know you see them and value them.
And finally, just be there. When my friend’s husband died suddenly, she told me about Ruth King just coming and sitting with her and letting her know she was not alone. Your presence can be a powerful gift.
Meditation
Please listen to John O”Donohue read Beannacht, A Blessing
https://youtu.be/0rYnWCophIM
Now take a moment to be still and listen to the wisdom of your heart and /or pray or chant words meaningful to you or in your own words. Or maybe take this moment to think about the people who have encouraged you.
Question(s) for reflection:
After the service today, if you would like to stay connected a little longer we can discuss the readings/reflections
Who has encouraged you? How did that encouragement make you feel?
What do you think is the best way to encourage someone?
What is your response to the reading? Did it touch/move or disturb you?
In what way is the reading relevant to your life experience past or present?
What might you take from this reading into the week ahead?
Extinguishing the chalice
Recite aloud or in silence:
We Are One by Amy Zucker Morgenstern
Never has it been more true than now:
We extinguish this flame,
But the sparks within us remain alight.
From each of us, in our supposed solitude,
The signals buzz and hum, sparkling through space one to another,
Connecting us invisibly
But palpably.
We are one.
And from every window,
Our light shines.
Blow out the candle you lit physically or in your mind’s eye.
Benediction
Recite aloud or in silence
Peace be my companion
Have courage
Hold onto what is good
Return to no person evil for evil
Strengthen the fainthearted
Support the weak
Help the suffering
Honor all beings
Amen and Blessed Be
Benediction Response: “Peace Be Unto This Congregation”
Announcements
There are no announcements this week :)
